Is Childhood The Foundation For Sexual Addiction? Part II

By Lawrence W. Daly, MSc

Yesterday I asked a lot of specific questions I didn’t have time to answer. Today I will address some of those questions and determine if my research and conclusions are reasonable and logical. As I stated yesterday there are no easy answers and finding them will take years of the proper scientific research. So today, let us look at the information we do have, do know and ascertain if we can come to some understandings and answers.

At some point in the sexual addict’s life, he/she has to come to the realization that their sexual addiction has created a host of problems and unless the addiction is addressed, a normal life is not reachable.  Sexual addiction can control the individual’s life to the point where they are unable to work, sustain relationships, eat and etc.

Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA) has a website where a sexual addict can visit, adhere to their suggestions and begin a life of sobriety. For some sexual addicts SAA will be sufficient in having the individual gain control of their lives. In the community in which the sex addict lives there will be several organizations available for a sexual addict to make contact with and if willing, join their weekly group.

The road to peace is not an easy road to find for anyone. The sexual addict attempts to try pleasure in other aspects of his/her life, but finding normal daily activities to be a major challenge. Is a website like the SAA or a weekly sexual addiction meeting enough to curtail the behavior of a sexual addict? The sexual addict is the individual who must make a determination if these are the solution to their problem.

The questions: is being exposed to childhood sexual abuse or sexual themes the foundation of life-long sexual addiction?  We can also take into consideration that this activity is now enhanced by the creation of the Internet, social media i.e. Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, etc.  The possibility that sexual themes will introduce younger children is simply a probability.  The percentage of children who are exposed to one of these social networking sites is more than likely.  Their social themes are developed surrounding their family members, peers, etc., discussing what is available to them if they search the Internet.

The foundation of sexual addiction at an early age i.e. ten years and younger seems more likely than any other time in history. Imagine Johnny who is nine years old knows how to work the Internet and as he is surfing the Internet accidently comes across a website of naked women and men. Biologically he will feel something special inside of him that he has never experienced before. Eventually this feeling will turn into masturbation and later sexual contact with another individual. If he does not take control of his behavior and/or a parent identifies that he is being exposed to pornography, his sexual development may turn upside down. All Johnny knows is the touching of his penis feels good and he begins to manipulate it. The desire to act out more and more can create a situation that Johnny is masturbating multiple times a day, at school, home, bathrooms, just about anywhere.

The foundation of Johnny’s sexual addiction problem can lead to other adverse behavior and/or seeking out other paraphilia’s. As I indicated yesterday, these adverse behaviors may lead Johnny to the criminal justice system because he acted out criminally and was apprehended and prosecuted.

The effects of the Internet and sexual addiction is the amount of effort and time the sexual addict placed into acting out. Children will come home from school go into their bedrooms and expend as many hours as possible on the Internet exploring the sexually provocative websites. The child sexual addict who expended his/her time in sports or with friends and family now is consumed by surfing the websites, which bring them instant sexual gratification.

It is interesting that the child sex addict knows what he/she is doing is wrong. So their actions are secret in nature and they know their actions must happen behind closed doors. Visual stimulation is a strong force for a child, even adults to deal with. This pull towards always visualizing pornography and seeking instant sexual gratification creates other mental issues. The child becomes so consumed with the addiction that depression sets in when gratification is not reached. Although masturbation does create a great feeling, the after results may be devastating. The sense of guilt that a child feels can lead to ideations of suicide or homicide.

Trying other sexual themes such as erotic asphyxiation or breath control play is the intentional restriction of oxygen to the brain for sexual arousal. The sexual preference for that behavior is variously called asphyxiophilia, autoerotic asphyxia, and hypoxyphilia.  Colloquially, a person engaging in the activity is sometimes called a gasper. The erotic interest in asphyxiation is classified as a paraphilia in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the American Psychiatric Association (Wikipedia).

It is common for families to find their children hanging dead from their bedroom closet, cut them down, dress them, lay them on their bed and call the police. Upon arrival if the law enforcement official has training they will identify the scenario as a staged natural death. After interviewing the family, the truth is generally ascertained and the medical examiner is called. In this type of case the medical examiner would be called anyways due to the age of the child.

Studies have demonstrated that sexual addiction is a major problem in today’s world. Everywhere an individual turns men and women are wearing sexually provocative clothing. The ads from advertisements, general gossip magazines display provocative pictures of men and women. Even the Sears Co. and JCPenney Company’s advertisements can be viewed by adults as being sexualized.

Additionally, the exposure of the manner in which men and women dress is very apparent when the child goes to the mall, hamburger joint, school, work and etc. Each contact is a reminder to the child of new and exciting sexual themes.

Tomorrow, I will continue the quest to identify just what sexual addiction is doing to children. There are a list of areas which need to be addressed which need exploration and explanation.

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