The Many Roles Of The Private Investigator In Investigating Child Sexual Abuse Allegations - Part XIX

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By Lawrence W. Daly, MSc
There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage. - Martin Luther King
In today’s Shine from Yahoo, author Piper Weiss wrote an article about “Why Do Women Stay With Men Through Scandals?” This article was promoted from the well exposed and published media scandal of Jerry Sandusky the former Penn State player and assistant coach who has been accused of sexually assaulting up to 10 young male athletes.

So what was Weiss’s main theme in her article? The key issues of her article surround why women who have husbands who have been accused of horrible crimes stay with their husbands. The question raises a multitude of considerations, ideologies, statistics, studies, scenarios, love, and so forth.

Considerations for a woman who is the wife of a man who may have committed a heinous crime such as the allegations which have been made against Sandusky raises questions about why his wife, Dottie Sandusky is currently standing by her husband. The first thought is she loves her husband unconditionally and it doesn’t matter what they have accused him of, the love is stronger than the alleged sexual allegations.

Most people think Dottie’s position is simply demonstrating a mental lacking in common sense. If one child stepped up to the plate and told authorities about being sexually abused by Sandusky then her position may be reasonable and logical. However, there are 10 young male athletes who are accusing Sandusky and if Dottie was sitting at your table and you were to ask her how 10 separate human beings got it wrong, lied, fantasized and disliked Sandusky, would this make sense? Further, wouldn’t you want to know if this is some type of conspiracy to send Sandusky to prison as a retaliation plot? What reasonable and logical alternative hypotheses would she consider to conclude that he is innocent?

Someone’s ideology can be a mixed bag of goods. Everyone has an idea, may it be subjective, objective, personal, and based upon their education and experience. What ideology supports that a woman needs or should support their husband when sexual allegations have been made against the husband? Recently, there have been other prominent figures in politics and movie stars who have destroyed relationships because of allegations that raped, molested, defrauded others, killed and so forth. Early on the philosophy was the woman stood by their husband. Demonstrating that the wife believes in their husband, they are seen in public standing next to their husband on a media platform; holding hands; walking arm in arm, as seen in the most recent public appearance of the Sandusky case as Sandusky and Dottie exited their vehicle, walked towards the courthouse and then entered the courtroom for the preliminary hearing.

These types of media displays of affection support the ideology that woman initially should stand by their husbands. Initially they stand by their husbands to demonstrate to their audience(s) that the information they have received to date, supports the idea that their husband is innocent until proven guilty. At some point the wife could change her opinion i.e. the ideology of just how far will she stand by her husband before exiting the scene.

There have been studies performed on these bizarre situations where women support their husbands or boyfriends. Specifically on the reaction of the wife to hear that their husband’s infidelity might be true. Most infidelity situations do not lead to divorce. The studies to date have dealt more with infidelity with other women, not children. The situation which occurs more often is where the married couple’s child accuses the husband of sexually assaulting the child.

The authorities such as Child Protective Services who has the responsibility of making sure that children are safe in their home requires the woman to support the child; believe the child is telling the truth; and protect the children from any contact with the alleged sexual offender. The majority of the time the husband will be required to move out of the home, until the alleged sexual assault allegations are investigated by law enforcement officials. Failure to abide by the above conditions would result in having the child removed from the home and taken into custody i.e. foster care.

The different types of scenarios that husbands and wives find themselves in comes down to understanding the allegations and who is making the alleged sexual assault allegations. The couple should make the immediate decision to retain legal counsel to consult with and obtain an understanding of what their legal rights are. The attorney should then retain the services of a private investigator who can respond to the alleged sexual assault allegations. The investigator will need to understand from the couple what may have taken place. The support of the wife is important during the initial phase of the investigation performed by law enforcement and a private investigator.

There are many different types of scenarios which can occur during an alleged sexual assault. Sometimes the incident can be a harmless confusing situation where the alleged child victim and alleged sexual offender accidently brush up against one another. However, the majority of the time the alleged sexual assault act isn’t harmless and the brushing up against one another can be a form of “grooming”.

A man and a woman come together for whatever reason and fall in love. Over the years of marriage their love for one another grows stronger. Sometimes the man may be living two separate lives. One, he is married and two; he is a serious sexual offender. The wife may have no idea of the secret life style and over the years may have had some feelings that something wasn’t right sexually, but let those feelings slide. Once the alleged sexual allegations come out the wife will stand by her man because she loves him unconditionally, and believes everything he says. When he tells her he is innocence she believes him and will believe him through the entire legal process.

As a forensic investigator, I have received telephone calls from woman telling me their boyfriend or husband has been accused of sexually assaulting a child and they know he is innocent of the allegations; that they are untrue and they know it.  If they want to expend funds to hire a forensic investigator to perform an investigation than I am willing to do so. If the man is out of jail why isn’t he calling me? This is a question I have difficulty with. However, there are no easy answers when it comes down to relationships.

Tomorrow, the many reasons why private investigators are retained to perform an investigation for a woman who has been accused of sexually abusing her two sons is a very strange and interesting case. Many times children have the ‘innocent’ idea that if they can get mother out of the house by telling the police they were sexually assaulted by their mother that life would be a bowl of cherries. Eventually, the boys will realize that life isn’t so easy without mother around and tell the authorities the truth. Unfortunately, for the mother she had to spend nine months in jail for a crime she didn’t commit, lost her job and home, and although the criminal charges were dismissed everyone still believes she is a sexual offender and did sexually assault her sons. I will take you through a case like what this mother suffered through because during the child interview phase a civilian interviewer didn’t ask the proper questions.

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