Who Is This "Predator" Who Sexually Assaults Children?

By Lawrence W. Daly, MSc

“I just yesterday returned from a trip where I photographed a woman with two children whom I photographed first when she was the age of the older of the two children”
                                                                                                                                      Jock Sturges

In a world where life is difficult to face on a day to day basis because of the evil which exists everywhere, there are individuals walking the streets that have a preference for children. They not only have a preference for children, but a sexual preference where harming and killing children is not just a fantasy, but a reality. Research wants society to believe that there is this small percentage of men and women who have been identified as being pedophiles.

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This research is generated from self-disclosures by sexual offenders, victims, and prisoners when they come into contact, negatively and positively, with the criminal justice system. Since these men and women who have contact with the criminal justice system are such a small percentage of the population the ‘true accounting’ of just how many “Predators” there are in your community is simply underestimated and unknown.

What if there was this mental evaluation which you as an individual were required to take as a prerequisite to work around children? Could this evaluation be a venue to ascertain if your sexual preference is children?

Research has demonstrated that a large percentage of those sexually assaulted as a child will later turn out to have some type of sexual addiction, paraphilia’s, and/or pedophilia problems.

Each week I lead several groups of Christian men who have sexual addiction problems. Generally, these men disclose that at a young age, between 5-8 years of age they were exposed to pornography. The pornography was owned and hidden by their fathers. However, the most interesting disclosure from these men, (which eventually occurs sometime during their nine months with me as their group leader) 80% disclose for the first time in their lives that they were sexually assaulted by a peer, a female babysitter and/or by a relative between the ages of 5-12 years old.

Studies may have a margin error of + and -, but imagine the true number of men and women who have been sexually assaulted and have never told anyone. The problem with sexual addicts is they have no boundaries. The attitude is everything goes, just as long as they can have sexual intercourse or medicate themselves by masturbating. There have been men who have disclosed that they fantasize about children and masturbate to these fantasies. It is my professional opinion that what they are telling me is that they have sexually assaulted a child along their sexually addicted life.

Of course some of my conclusions are based on supposition and subjectiveness, but I have been in the sexual assault/addiction world since 1983 and during that time I have met all kinds of Predators. Is it too much to call a sex addict who sexually fantasizes about children a Predator? Is it necessary to label these types of individuals? How many men and women do you know who have a sexual addiction problem and have never disclosed their fantasies and how they deal with these fantasies.

The correlation between sexual assaulting children and being a sex addict seems to be splitting hairs. The paraphilia which Predators seem to have maybe evident that they are two of a kind for the greater percentage. Now those of you who read my articles may believe I have over stepped my professional opinion. Think for a minute, where does a sex addict who needs to medicate themselves stop and place boundaries around their sexual fantasizes? Do they have the necessary will power to stop their sexual fantasies? How do they throw a loop around their neck and squeeze it until that sexual fantasy moment goes away. If you know the answers to just some of these questions than you have just uncovered the undiscovered medication for those who can’t control their sexual desires.

Wait you say, you have taken this sexual addiction theory too far. Then my response is then why 80% of those who attend are church having sexual addiction issues. How do you decrease those who fantasize about sexually assaulting children to a reasonable number which is objective, neutral and accurate? Doesn’t it bother you that a man can sit in front of his computer and search for pornographic pictures of men and woman, allegedly by passing child pornographic websites and then medicate themselves? Is there a logical explanation for why I can see outside the box and conclude that the two, pedophilia and sexual addiction are simply too close to separate?

Has there been studies conducted which ask men and women if the reason they don’t disclose that they fantasize about children sexually is because of the label connotation which comes with the admission. To be labeled a pedophile is political suicide. There is a Scarlet Letter waiting for those individuals who admit they are a “Predator” of children. However, to say you’re a sexual addict does not ring any bells and society views this label as something men and women just happen to deal with during their life.

Is there something which I have overlooked which makes my assumptions difficult to grasp? It seems to me that in the 40 men I talk to each week that 32 of them were sexually assaulted as a child and now suffer from sexual addiction. Studies have shown that the sexual assaults of a child make it more reasonable and logical that a percentage of those sexually assaulted as a child will then turn around and sexually assault children. It is a door which revolves around and around. There is no cure for those who suffer from being a “Predator”. There is no cure for those who are sexual addicts.

The old saying states that sometimes there is a reason why the river crosses the road, seems to make sense in my analogy of the pedophile and sexual addict. Obviously there needs to be a multitude of professional research performed which will determine if the correlation behind being a “Predator” and a sexual addict may just have too much commonality that to separate them is only a political correctness issue.

In the recent case of former Congressman Anthony Weiner, his response to him sexually acting out was to admit himself into a sexual addiction treatment facility. One of the questions I would have asked of Mr. Weiner is it possible he too was a sexual victim of a “Predator” when he was a child? If other politicians and movie stars before him disclosed being sexually assaulted as a child, why do they hide behind their disclosures? Could they not assist others to come forward and disclose that they too are a victim of being sexually assaulted as a child?

It doesn’t make sense that as human beings we do not want to help others when being victimized is such an important component of functioning as a healthy individual. One could argue that the sexual fantasies of children are not a crime. I would agree that a dream, daydreaming or a fantasy does not reach the level of a crime, however the likelihood is if individuals are having sexual fantasies about children is it possible they have become fixated on children and may act out their fantasies?

As research continues in this area of victimization of children, I hope that those who have been victimized will come forward and disclose their sexual assaults.

Tomorrow, the need to review the literature on just who these individuals are who sexually assault children needs an in depth review and research. Let us examine who these individuals may be together. The journey will be worth your while.

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